Everyone has a dream. Whether they be a singer who mesmerize everyone with his golden voice, or become a scientist who discovers new and amazing things, or anything, I'm sure they think about it.
I have dreams just like everyone else. Dreams of the good life with lots of money, my established career, and also my lovely family as the source of happiness.
When
I was a child, I had a lot of dreams. I didn't why, but I knew it was
just desires. I wanted to be a stewardess because most of them are
beautiful women. After that, I wanted to be a doctor who helps a lot of
people with his white coat, so damn cool! I also wanted to be a teacher,
architect, and a famous artist. I was just dreaming of what I want, but didn't focus to run.
College is my first step to achieve my dream. Currently
I am a student of Semarang State University in Accounting major. Can
you guess my dream? Alright. I wanna be a professional accountant,
especially public accountant. I choose it because it appropriates with
my major and it has a good chance in working world, of course. But I
know it will never happen without any effort. What I should do now is
study hard as a student and practice to be what I want.
In addition, I wanna be a businesswoman. Why do I want to be a businesswoman? Because I wanna get my freedom on my job. Actually I don't like to be commended. An independent woman who is good at dealing with business and financial matters, it may be a great choice.
Every action is a choice. Everyone has their own choice to decide what
they want to be. We just have to dream and focus to achieve it. People
who doesn't have a dream will not fly far away. So, keep dreaming! ^^
Minggu, 26 April 2015
Hy Putri...
BalasHapusWhatever they be a singer who 'mesmerize' everyone....
I think you should add 's' after the word 'mesmerize'.
Whatever they be a singer who 'mesmerizes' everyone....
Oh I see.. Thanks ineeeesss :*
BalasHapusHy Putri Vera...
BalasHapusI will give you feedbacks
1. I think you less to add "article An" in (architect) word. "An Architect"
2." Currently I am a student of Semarang State University in Accounting major."
"Currently I am a student of State University of Semarang in Accounting major."
Oh iyaaa I forgot it. Thans andinaaaa:*
BalasHapusHi Putri here are some corrections for your article:
BalasHapus1. In sentence "Whether they be a singer who mesmerize everyone..." please add "s" in mesmerize so the sentence should be "Whether they be a singer who mesmerizes everyone..."
2. In sentence "...everyone with his golden voice, or become a..." you should write "his/her" because you used the subject "a singer" so it could be a woman or a man. Did you get it? :D
3. You should write "I want to be..." not "I wanna be.." because you wrote a formal article. The word "I wanna be.." is an American slang which is used for informal dialogues/conversations
I think that's all. Your dreams is so great. Keep struggling! :D
Alright thanks a lot nanaaaaaa :*
BalasHapusiyeeeeey :*
BalasHapusbut didn't focus to run. are you sure focus is a verb? have you known? focus is a noun, you should add some verbs like get, do etc .
BalasHapusActually I don't like to be commended. commended? Its mean “terpuji”. Or command?? Think again.
thanks :)
Komentar ini telah dihapus oleh pengarang.
BalasHapusHi Hendra, would you like to give me some feedback to my article? I'm so glad if you will :)
BalasHapusAlright thanks hendra :*
BalasHapusHello Vera, I will give some feedback for you.
BalasHapus1. Semarang State University
I think you should change that with “State University of Semarang”.
2. Alright. I wanna be a professional accountant, especially public accountant.
I think you should add article “a” in your sentence
Alright. I wanna be a professional accountant, especially “a public accountant”.
I think that's enough. Because the other feedback is given by the other.
Thank You :D